Sports Recap

College Basketball
This past spring brought it's usual and now expected craziness of upsets, buzzer beaters, and amazing comebacks in what we like to call "March Madness." The craziest part about it was listening to Jim Nance's post-game interview with some of the newly crowned champion Florida Gator players. Jim Nance asked center Joakim Noah about what Florida did to win the game. In amazing fashion, Joakim Noah testified of the quality of his education at the University of Florida by saying, "Me and my boys brought it, and when I say we brought it you know what I mean? No you don't know what I mean, but my boys know what I mean." It seemed as if Jim Nance was pushing a panic button that flashed the words "COMMERCIAL BREAK! COMMERCIAL BREAK!" on the producer's screen up in the video room. It didn't stop there, Nance went on to interview a couple others which only buried the academic validity of Florida athletes. It seemed as if none of them had any formal schooling or had been taught the English language from a book. I don't think the Florida officials shed a single tear when four starters chose to bypass their senior seasons and declared themselves eligible for the NBA draft. Those five players' decision to leave just might have doubled the school's average GPA.

Pro Basketball
Can anybody out there look at me straight faced and tell me without even smirking that NBA officials do not show favoritism and that the NBA is free from conspiracies and inconsistencies? Yeah, I didn't think so. Case and point, I went to game 4 of the Western Conference Finals between the Jazz and Spurs. Steve Javie, the head referee, is a ruthless tyrant that reigns with terror on teams he doesn't particularly like. Just as Joey Crawford would like to pick a fight with Tim Duncan, I don't think it would be far fetched to say that, if given the chance, Steve Javie would love nothing more than to line up every player and coach on the Jazz roster and kick them square in the crotch. Although he didn't do it physically, he did it mentally with the horrendous way he and his crew handled this game. Not only did he kick out Derek Fisher, who has been in the top 5 for "Sportsman of the Year" every year for a long time, but he also refused to call fouls on the Spurs. Riddle me this Batman, how did the Jazz lose by double digits despite having fewer turnovers and shooting over 53% from the field? I'll tell you how, by the officials giving the Spurs 20+ free throws in the 4th and the Jazz 2. Here's an interesting fact, the officials called fouls 90% of the time that the Spurs drove to the basket, and 10% of the time the Jazz did the same. Can you tell me there was that much difference in the physicality on both ends? I think not. Do you really blame the fans for getting a little boisterous and chanting "REFS YOU (OPPOSITE OF BLOW)! REFS YOU (OPPOSITE OF BLOW)!"? Good thing Jazz fans love Booz but must don't drink beer or there might have another Palace Brawl.

NFL
**NEWSFLASH** JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE A FOOTBALL PLAYER YOU ARE NOT IMMUNE TO BREAKING THE LAW! It seems like there are more convicts in the NFL than there is in every other professional sport combined. It will be interesting to see if Commissioner Roger Goodell throws the hammer down on Michael Vick for his dog fighting regime. Vick danced his way around alleged possession of marijuana, so I don't see anything coming of this current case. I hope Vick hires a good legal counsel or he might say something stupid on the stand like, "Your Honor, I thought that dog fighting is legal where cock fighting is legal......"

Baseball
I'd now like to take the time to make a personal announcement. I have meddled over this decision for many, many years. While my parents don't like it, and lot of friends don't support it, I feel I will receive enough support from others to sustain and validate my decision. Here it goes, I am attracted to baseball! I've never been a supporter of baseball and never had a team, although I would secretly watch the World Series every year growing up in my room with the door locked so my parents wouldn't know what I was doing. I am strangely attracted to the competitiveness of the sport and having "a team" to root for. Not only am I coming out as a baseball fan, but also a San Francisco Giants fan. Why San Francisco? Well, I think it's fairly obvious, but for those who don't know let me give you the rundown. First, Barry Bonds is awesome. I've always liked him and have never wavered on my support of him through this ridiculoius steroids investigation by MLB. Will he beat Hank Aaron's homerun record? Yes. Should it be in the record books? Yes. Should he be inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame? Yes! You can't tell me "steroids" gave Bonds the fluid motion of his swing. Second, what's cooler than home run balls landing in a bay to be had amongst the person with the swiftest swing of a net or strongest swing of an oar in the general direction of the other people going after the ball. And third, I like the 49ers, so it only makes sense to like the Giants too, right? Because I'm new at this baseball thing, I reserve the right to change teams if "my team" is really bad. Expos fans reserved that right and shipped their team to DC.