The 2007 Pre-season College Football Top 25 Poll - Injustice at it's Finest

College football is the greatest sport, until the very end of the season and right before the season starts. The very end of the season because everybody is once again reminded how retarded the BCS system and how meaningless the bowls are in the grand scheme of things. Even the bowls are losing meaning because there are so many of them. Then there is the time right before the season starts when the pre-season polls are released. Pre-season polls either give a school a springboard advantage which it did not deserve or an extreme disadvantage because they have to win and count on everybody else losing in order to move up the poll. Because of the bias amongst media and the coaches, some schools' ranking makes no logical sense. Schools should start where they ended the season before, after all, it is the program that makes the players, not the players that make the program. Every year the media and coaches insist on putting the same teams in the top 25 that over promise and under deliver year in and year out. Yet, because they were once good, there is always that gleaming hope that "this year will be the year." Let's take a look at how the pre-season top 25 looks:

1. USC - No surprise here, Pete Carroll just wins regardless of who plays.
2. LSU - Loses starting QB as well as key players on the defensive side of the ball yet moves up from where they ended last year.
3. Florida - No surprise here, first time starter Tim Tebow must prove that he can win.
4. Texas - Up 9 spots from their 2006 finish, still riding on the coat tails of their 2005 National Championship.
5. Michigan - Did anybody else watch the Rose Bowl last year? Just checking.......
6. West Virginia - Jumped 4 spots from last year, even ahead of Louisville, who pasted them last year.
7. Wisconsin - One of only 2 schools that start where they finished.
8. Oklahoma - Loses to Boise State in the Fiesta Bowl, loses their team MVP, but moves up 3 spots.
9. Virginia Tech - I don't understand this one, up 10 spots from last year. Please don't tell me it's because of the VT massacre this past spring. Indeed that was awful, but let's not coddle the football team.
10. Ohio State - Dropped 8 spots, for reason. Let's see who steps up at QB first.
11. Louisville - Down from #6 at last seasons end, is Bobby Petrino's loss that bad?
12. California - No comment here.
13. Georgia - Once again, the Bulldogs debut in the top 15 after ending the previous season barely in the top 25. Who wants to wager they lose 3 games again??
14. Auburn - Always a solid top 25 selection. Deserved? Yeah, I guess.
15. Tennessee - See Auburn comment.
16. Rutgers - Rutgers has been a no-show when it comes to college football for years, then they have a decent year in 2006 and we expect it to be a norm. Expect them to stay high all season playing in the Big Least Conference.
17. UCLA - UCL eh? They ended last season without a single vote and start the season #17? Please, someone explain this one to me.
18. Penn State - See Auburn comment.
19. Nebraska - Nebraska ended the season #27, they have been the most overrated team for the past 10 years. No matter how many times they start in the top 25, they will never return to their once prominent past.
20. Arkansas - McFadden is the glue that has held this team in the top 25 for the past 3 seasons, expect that to change next year.
21. Florida State - The most underachieving school in college football the last 5 years ladies and gentleman. Bobby Bowden is not the coach he once was.
22. TCU - The second team that starts where they finished. They are the non-BCS darlings, this one is no surprise.
23. Boise State - See TCU comment (about being the non-BCS darlings).
24. Hawaii - The NEW non-BCS darlings.
25. Texas A&M - See Auburn comment.

The BCS rankings are not released until mid-season to better reflect which schools are better. Perhaps all polls should follow the same protocol. The bias in college football makes me sick. I have not mentioned the worst of them all yet, and that is BYU. The Cougars finished last year #15, with their coach winning the Western Region Coach of the Year, their offense ranked #2 in scoring, and their defense #10 in points allowed, yet they start 2007 down 19 spots at #34. TCU, one of the many teams BYU beat last season is 12 spots up. Get a research crew on this one, they will simply find that the Cougars got hosed.

Celtics Are Now a Solid #4 Seed

Last year the Denver Nuggets acquired Allen Iverson and there was talk of the Nuggets running the table and winning the NBA Championship. The Nuggets ended up being a 7-seed in the West and bowed out in the first round of the playoffs. Now it's Boston that has Championship buzz after trading for a superstar in Kevin Garnett. There have even been talks of a new "Big Three" like Larry Bird, Kevin McHale, and Robert Parish of old. Ray Allen, Paul Pierce, and Kevin Garnett are good, but it still remains to be seen if they can play together. Take the 2004 Los Angeles Lakers for example; that team was the greatest assembly of superstars in the history of the NBA, but they could not play together and ended up choking the Championship away to the Detroit Pistons. Not only is the premature "New Big Three" unproven, but Pierce and Allen are one more injury from retirement. Not to mention, who will run the offense with the "New Big Three" on the court? Rajon Rondo is definitely not an experienced point guard, and quite frankly, he's not that good. Also, after trading away 7 players to get Garnett, the Celtics bench is depleted., After years of trying to rebuild the Celtics, GM Danny Ainge finally realized that veterans are key to rebuilding. What Ainge has done in bringing in Ray Allen and KG is remarkable, the Celtics have went from bottom dwellers in the East to a potential spot in the Finals next year. However, if the Celtics are to go to the Finals next year, they will have to make it through at least 3 other teams:
(1) Cleveland Cavaliers
(2) Detroit Pistons
(3) Miami Heat
And that's just the least of them in a very weak Eastern Conference. There are still the Chicago Bulls, Toronto Raptors, New York Knicks, and Orlando Magic that are on the rise. Boston might just blaze the exact trail that the Nuggets did last year......a 7-seed and an early summer vacation.

French Are Right on With Le Tour de France

France is one of those countries that always gets picked on. In a preview for Rush Hour 3, Chris Tucker grabs a Chinese guy, shakes him, and starts interrogating him over something. The Chinese man starts speaking some gibberish to which Chris Tucker replies, "What did you say boy?!?!" Jackie Chan pipes up, "I think he is speaking French." Chris Tucker then shakes the poor man more violently while yelling, "Stop insulting yourself, you're Chinese!" The other day my little sister in grade school had a joke for me. "What's the shortest book ever written?" I stood there flabbergasted racking my brain for the answer. "French war heroes," she replied. Ah, now that made perfect sense. (I must say though, French soccer player Zidane looked like a war hero when he headbutted that Italian guy in the '06 World Cup)
However, amongst all these scrutinies, the French have got it right with Le Tour de France. One night I found myself flipping through channels and Le Tour was on. I ended up watching it for an hour, and I'm not going to lie, it was exciting. There, riding those bicycles, with those tight clothes and funky helmets, are well conditioned athletes. Not only that, but it's quite entertaining to watch the crazy spectators on the side of the road that further validate the stupid things people do when they know they are on TV. I love it when I see people on cell phones talking to a family member/friend watching at home and waiting for the camera to pass by them so they can point and waive to the camera, "DO YOU SEE ME?!?! HERE I AM!!!"
Last night's stage of the race was exciting because it had yet another stray dog. This time the dog wandered onto the road and took out a couple of riders. One of the riders slid on the road and got some pretty bad road rash on his back side, he later when on to win the stage. That will be a story to tell the grand children, "Yeah, I ran over Old Yeller with my bike and then went on to win!" I've always said that if you want to make a commercial better, you add a monkey. If you want to make Le Tour de France better, add a dog!

Nike Needs to Rethink Endorsements

I've never quite understood why endorsements are given as a sense of entitlement to athletes instead of a reward. Secondly, I've never understood why a company would choose to endorse athletes with no class or character. While major corporations carefully choose spokespeople that will represent the company well, it seems sports companies just go after the ones that will bring in the most money. Let me present three cases, all involving Nike endorsees: Kobe Bryant, Michelle Wie, and Michael Vick.

-Kobe Bryant
If you have forgotten the Kobe Bryant rape case from 2 years ago, then Nike is smiling now from cheek to cheek. With heat being put on Nike for endorsing a man accused of rape, they pulled all Kobe Bryant Nike ads. However; the second Kobe's trial was over shoes and merchandise were being manufactured as fast as bunnies. Kobe is once again the poster child for Nike basketball. Is it a matter of Nike wanting to endorse athletes with character, or wanting to endorse the athlete that will make them the most money? Obviously it is the latter.

-Michelle Wie
Before she even played in a major event, before she even graduated from high school, and before she ever quit......I mean "withdrew" from a tournament with soreness in her wrist, Nike had signed Michelle Wie to a multi-million dollar endorsement. Their thinking is that this girl would be the Tiger Woods of the LPGA. Boy oh boy were they wrong. Not only has Wie not played a single weekend on any PGA tour events; but also she has not even finished in the top 10 in a single LPGA event. This is a classic case of an athlete given an entitlement endorsement rather than a reward endorsement. I hope Nike is regretting signing this young lady, as they should. (Have you ever heard of Morgan Pressel? She's younger and has WON an LPGA tournament)

-Michael Vick
If you had millions of dollars, what would you do? I'd probably spend more time golfing, buy a nice car, and add to my movie collection. Michael Vick, on the other hand, buys houses for his friends, lots of dogs, and trains those dogs to fight and kill each other! And when the dogs don't finish the job, good ol' Michael does it for them in cruel and unusual ways! Damn, I want to buy that guys' Nike shoes. He redefines the old Gatorade tagline, "I want to be like Mike." Before Vick had been indicted on the recent dog fighting allegations, he had already been detained at an airport for suspected drug possession and told a few Atlanta Falcons they were #1 with Mr. Tallman (you know? The centermost finger on his hand......) With all this surrounding Nike's top football endorsee, they finally decided to pull their Michael Vick shoes. So much for signing people with character, how much you want to bet that the shoes are on the shelves within days of Vick being let off the hook? I hope I'm wrong on this one, I really do.

Jason Hart?? Come on Jazz--Are You Kidding Me??

The Utah Jazz ended the 06-07 season with plenty of hope for the 07-08 season. Predicted to finish 8th in the West in the pre-season polls, the Jazz ran the tables and made it all the way to the Western Conference Finals. Things were looking up in late June after the season ended, they only had 3 players not signed to contracts that all wanted to come back. The Jazz didn't need to upgrade, their experience in the playoffs was enough and were already looking like a potential front runner again for the 07-08 season. But then came the falling out of Derek Fisher, who left the team to seek medical attention for his daughter and signed with the Los Angeles Lakers. I respect Derek Fisher for his decision and will be rooting for him next season to do well, but surely not his team. Then the Jazz drafted Morris Almond, the purest shooter in the draft out of Rice, and Kyrylo Fesenko, a tall athletic center from Ukraine. In addition, the Jazz also signed the rights to match any contract offer for 2nd year point guard Dee Brown and 3rd year shooting guard C.J. Miles. It is also expected the Jazz with offer center Rafael Araujo the same contract. And now comes the juggernaut, without any notice, the Jazz announced they have signed another shooting guard in Jason Hart. This one begs to ask the VP of operations for the Jazz, Kevin O'Connor, "What in the bleepity bleep are you thinking??" The Jazz lose a proven champion, veteran, and motivator in Derek Fisher, and then sign an unproven, journeyman, that has made the visit to 5 different teams during 6 years in the NBA. Even O'Connor seems very unsure about the deal, saying of Hart, "he brings some veteran leadership a little bit." The Jazz right now are trying to go up and escalator that is going down. Last week Morris Peterson visited the team, a guy who fits the mold of a Derek Fisher. Without notice, the Jazz waste an "undisclosed amount"of money to Jason Hart on a multi-year contract, after Peterson chose to sign the the New Orleans Hornets. I stress "multi-year contract" because Hart has never played more than a year with any other previous team, being waived or traded every year. Hart's numbers are no better than the worst player on the Jazz roster that received comparable minutes to Hart last season. Either the Jazz are loading up for a multi-player trade, or they have gone mad. Until that trade happens, Jason Heart--go out there and prove me wrong (along with every other loyal Jazz fan out there).

Sports Recap

College Basketball
This past spring brought it's usual and now expected craziness of upsets, buzzer beaters, and amazing comebacks in what we like to call "March Madness." The craziest part about it was listening to Jim Nance's post-game interview with some of the newly crowned champion Florida Gator players. Jim Nance asked center Joakim Noah about what Florida did to win the game. In amazing fashion, Joakim Noah testified of the quality of his education at the University of Florida by saying, "Me and my boys brought it, and when I say we brought it you know what I mean? No you don't know what I mean, but my boys know what I mean." It seemed as if Jim Nance was pushing a panic button that flashed the words "COMMERCIAL BREAK! COMMERCIAL BREAK!" on the producer's screen up in the video room. It didn't stop there, Nance went on to interview a couple others which only buried the academic validity of Florida athletes. It seemed as if none of them had any formal schooling or had been taught the English language from a book. I don't think the Florida officials shed a single tear when four starters chose to bypass their senior seasons and declared themselves eligible for the NBA draft. Those five players' decision to leave just might have doubled the school's average GPA.

Pro Basketball
Can anybody out there look at me straight faced and tell me without even smirking that NBA officials do not show favoritism and that the NBA is free from conspiracies and inconsistencies? Yeah, I didn't think so. Case and point, I went to game 4 of the Western Conference Finals between the Jazz and Spurs. Steve Javie, the head referee, is a ruthless tyrant that reigns with terror on teams he doesn't particularly like. Just as Joey Crawford would like to pick a fight with Tim Duncan, I don't think it would be far fetched to say that, if given the chance, Steve Javie would love nothing more than to line up every player and coach on the Jazz roster and kick them square in the crotch. Although he didn't do it physically, he did it mentally with the horrendous way he and his crew handled this game. Not only did he kick out Derek Fisher, who has been in the top 5 for "Sportsman of the Year" every year for a long time, but he also refused to call fouls on the Spurs. Riddle me this Batman, how did the Jazz lose by double digits despite having fewer turnovers and shooting over 53% from the field? I'll tell you how, by the officials giving the Spurs 20+ free throws in the 4th and the Jazz 2. Here's an interesting fact, the officials called fouls 90% of the time that the Spurs drove to the basket, and 10% of the time the Jazz did the same. Can you tell me there was that much difference in the physicality on both ends? I think not. Do you really blame the fans for getting a little boisterous and chanting "REFS YOU (OPPOSITE OF BLOW)! REFS YOU (OPPOSITE OF BLOW)!"? Good thing Jazz fans love Booz but must don't drink beer or there might have another Palace Brawl.

NFL
**NEWSFLASH** JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE A FOOTBALL PLAYER YOU ARE NOT IMMUNE TO BREAKING THE LAW! It seems like there are more convicts in the NFL than there is in every other professional sport combined. It will be interesting to see if Commissioner Roger Goodell throws the hammer down on Michael Vick for his dog fighting regime. Vick danced his way around alleged possession of marijuana, so I don't see anything coming of this current case. I hope Vick hires a good legal counsel or he might say something stupid on the stand like, "Your Honor, I thought that dog fighting is legal where cock fighting is legal......"

Baseball
I'd now like to take the time to make a personal announcement. I have meddled over this decision for many, many years. While my parents don't like it, and lot of friends don't support it, I feel I will receive enough support from others to sustain and validate my decision. Here it goes, I am attracted to baseball! I've never been a supporter of baseball and never had a team, although I would secretly watch the World Series every year growing up in my room with the door locked so my parents wouldn't know what I was doing. I am strangely attracted to the competitiveness of the sport and having "a team" to root for. Not only am I coming out as a baseball fan, but also a San Francisco Giants fan. Why San Francisco? Well, I think it's fairly obvious, but for those who don't know let me give you the rundown. First, Barry Bonds is awesome. I've always liked him and have never wavered on my support of him through this ridiculoius steroids investigation by MLB. Will he beat Hank Aaron's homerun record? Yes. Should it be in the record books? Yes. Should he be inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame? Yes! You can't tell me "steroids" gave Bonds the fluid motion of his swing. Second, what's cooler than home run balls landing in a bay to be had amongst the person with the swiftest swing of a net or strongest swing of an oar in the general direction of the other people going after the ball. And third, I like the 49ers, so it only makes sense to like the Giants too, right? Because I'm new at this baseball thing, I reserve the right to change teams if "my team" is really bad. Expos fans reserved that right and shipped their team to DC.

NBA All-Stars Losing Their Glamour

This year's NBA All-Star Game is a bit different then those in years past. For beginners, the game is being played in Las Vegas, the first time the game has been played in a city without a NBA team. Also, it will be a game full of lack-luster, non-deserving players. In my mind, the All-Star Game should be for those players that have played like an All-Star during the year and are deserving of recognition. However, that is not the case because the starters are voted in by fans (making it the "American Idol" event of professional basketball). Let's look at the glaring problems with this year's All-Star game for the East and West. With the East, there is Shaquille O'Neal. Shaq is a dominant player, but has he been an All-Star this year? NO! Shaq has played in more All-Star games (14) than he has games this season (10). Dwight Howard should have gotten the nod to start. Then there is the new Kobe Bryant of the NBA, Gilbert Arenas. Gilbert scores points, but do I believe that he should be a starter? Once again, no. Arenas is shooting a pathetic 43% from the field and has hoisted up 984 shots this year. No wonder why he scores so much, it's a simple numbers game. "Now if I throw up at least 20 shots a game I'm bound to score about 30 a game and make the All-Star team." Not to mention, Arenas has taken 413 foul shots already this season, solidifying his status as a flopper that gets too much star treatment. Caron Butler, Arenas' teammate, is more deserving of the start. Anybody that watches the Wizards knows that as Butler goes, so does the team. With the West, every position is out of whack. The team features 3 centers and 2 "point forwards." First, Yao Ming is the starter when he has been gone since November with a broken foot. Because the NBA knows that Yao has the backing of millions in China and is a lock as the starter every year, they list Duncan and Garnett as forwards so they have chances to start as well. Here's a couple of homework assignments for all of you, go home and watch all the Spurs' and Timberwolves' games from this year and tell me how many games Tim Duncan and Kevin Garnett played forward spots and not center. I'm telling you now, you can count them on one hand. Here' s your second homework assignment, go watch all the Jazz's games from this year and tell me how many games Mehmet Okur played center and not power forward. Center is not Okur's natural position, he's even 2 inches shorter than Duncan, but that's the position he plays. Why do I mention this? Well, because Okur was listed as a center on the All-Star ballot. Quite the conspiracy theory, no? The same goes for the point guard position on the West's squad...Kobe Bryant! Seriously, how many times does Kobe play the point? Steve Nash has won two straight MVPs, is averaging double the assists that Kobe does (which is really the purpose of the point guard, right?) and still gets snubbed out of a starting spot on the team because Kobe and T-Mac have to start. Then there is the story of the 2 Nuggets, Allen Iverson and Carmelo Anthony. Neither deserve an All-Star selection this year but they both got one. While 'Melo sat out 15 games for that sissy punch he threw, Iverson sat out for a month after demanding a trade. When together, they were supposed to be unstoppable, everybody thought it would be the start of a Nuggets dynasty. Yeah, with 'Melo and Iverson together, the Nuggets have a losing record and have allowed a Boozer-less Jazz to gain a 7 game lead on them in the division. The NBA needs to re-evaluate what the purpose of the All-Star Game is. Is it to earn money by showcasing it's most popular faces, or is it a way to recognize players that have stepped it up and played like an "All-Star"? As of right now it's the first, which is a shame.

Reversal of Roles for Father and Son

When Austin stepped onto the court at The Marriott Center on the campus of BYU he found himself playing under the shadow of a great. The retired jersey of Danny Ainge lurks in the rafters above everybody that plays there. But, to Austin, Danny Ainge is more than a great player that changed the face of BYU basketball, Danny Ainge is his father. Austin Ainge has had his critics while playing at BYU, “He’s definitely not Danny,” has been muttered more than once. However, right now, the tides are changing. Danny Ainge, the Executive Director of Basketball Operations for the Boston Celtics, is making history. The Celtics have lost a franchise record 14 straight games. In the days of Larry Bird, and Danny Ainge, the longest losing streak the Celtics ever had was 4 games. Austin Ainge, the starting point guard at BYU, is making a little history of his own. BYU has been dominant during their current winning streak, having picked up road wins at The Pit in New Mexico and at Utah, which BYU hasn’t done in over 20 years. In addition, BYU has defeated Air Force and UNLV, #10 and #13 rpi, at home by a combined 36 points. Those two wins added to BYUs current home winning streak, 28 games, the second longest in the nation. All while doing this, Austin has contributed significantly with his pin-point passing, sharp shooting, and ability to control the tempo of the game. For just this little moment in time, in seems that Austin may be the one lurking over his father.

Brett Favre - Please Retire NEXT Year

Brett Favre has more than accomplished what he set out to do in the NFL. When Favre came into the league, there were droves of people that pronounced his name "Fav-ray," I still do. Favre brought back a Super Bowl title to the Green Bay Packers, has won 3 MVPs, brought tears to many frozen cheeseheads, and was behind the scenes in the now infamous "Lambeau Leap." Didn't you just love how hard the Broncos tried during their Super Bowl runs to make their "Mile High Salute" just as/if not more popular and failed miserably? Those Denver Donkeys, so funny......
Favre has also made his mark on the record books, he holds the NFL records for most consecutive starts (237) and most consecutive 3,000 yard seasons (15). Favre needs just 7 TD passes, 2 more wins, 3,900 yards passing, and 5 interceptions to become the NFL all-time leader in each of those respective categories. With that said, I can understand why he would come back for one more year, but anything after that will just be another sports star at the slaughter, like Michael Jordan with the Washington Wizards. Watching "His Airness" dunk those last couple of seasons was like watching Oliver Miller dunk...in slow motion. It's been a good run Brett, you have your spot in Canton, so just play your last season, retire, and move on with life. Your now gray hairs will always be remembered and your legend has been solidified at the frozen tundra of Lambeau Field!

Pick Your Poison - There's No Way Around It

I don't know what is worse: having to wait 2 weeks for the Super Bowl, being a sports writer that has to find a Super Bowl topic that hasn't been beaten like a dead horse, or the innocent public having to read the crap that the sports writers put in front of us. Today, all 3 have joined forces, in the form of the crappiest article ever written on espn.com. David Thorpe of espn.com posted an article this morning entitled, "Best football players from NBA rosters." In this article, Thorpe goes through a football roster and puts NBA players in every position. In his opening paragraph he wrote, "take a second to imagine the kind of havoc some of these guys would wreak on the football field." This has to be the most ludicrous notion I have ever heard, that basketball players can make a switch to the NFL. I don't think Thorpe has even watched any of the fights this season, none of them can even land a clean punch. Heck Thorpe, the golf season just started, why don't you write an article on best women's golfers in the NBA, that would for sure involve Mike Miller, Mike Dunleavy, Troy Murphy, and Adam Morrison (he wouldn't be the first LPGA golfer with a moustache). How about the best basketball players from soccer? I can see David Beckham running the point and Freddy Adu throwing down some LeBron-esque dunks! Ooh, what about John Daly on the pitcher's mound? Hey, if David Wells can do it, anybody can. Better yet, what about professional wrestlers in baseball? They would fit right in with the steroids and all; however, their flopping abilities may be better suited to the NBA. If you are not an insider subscriber to espn.com, I'm terribly sorry you cannot participate in reading this laughfest of an article, maybe there is a reason they make you pay to read that stuff, it's that bad.

Carlos Boozer Out 4-6 Weeks

When Carlos Boozer went down last Saturday against the Hornets after banging knees with Tyson Chandler, it just seemed like a bone bruise. Boozer had an MRI on Sunday that came back negative and sat out the Jazz's heart breaking loss to the Nets. In a revaluation today, a hairline fracture was found is Boozer's left fibula, sidelining the likely All-Star selection for 4-6 weeks. Was anybody really surprised by this? Boozer has missed at least 30 games in each of his first two seasons with the Jazz. His first season in Utah he missed 31 games and last season he missed 59. Boozer was the key to the Jazz's resurgence this year, leading the team with 22 points a game and almost 12 rebounds. This latest injury puts the Jazz in quite a pickle. Right now they are sitting on top of their division, but they are going to have to find some scoring and rebounding to make up for Boozer's loss or they are going to lose their division and quite possibly be reeling towards another lottery selection in next year's draft. Rumors have been circulating about a possible trade of Andrei Kirilenko. If the Jazz can get someone that scores over 15 a game, I would consider it an even swap for Kirilenko. Kirilenko has a massive contract and getting rid of him would free up cap space for the Jazz to sign a free agent this summer. Rookie Paul Milsap filled in for Boozer last game and did well (16 points, 13 rebounds, 3 assists), so now that I think about it, maybe Boozer is the one that needs to worry about his roster spot when he returns. Milsap is going to participate in the Rookie Challenge, which is pretty amazing considering he was a late second round pick in the draft. Let's all just relax, the Jazz just might be alright, another rookie from La. Tech is going to save us. Are there any guards from Gonzaga coming out next year?

Joe Namath - Most Overrated Quarterback Ever

Here we are, the week leading up to the Super Bowl. There has been no trash talking yet, thanks goodness, I believe the Bears and Colts are a lot classier than last year's participants. Did anybody else want to put a muzzle around Steelers linebacker Joey Porter and Seahawks tight end Jerramy Stevens last year? Boy, Jerramy Stevens sure backed up what he said dropping that wide open touchdown in the game, solidifying him as a "all talk and no walk" football player. As I sat down to read the newspaper I came across an article in the Deseret News about Peyton Manning in comparison to one of the alleged great quarterbacks, Joe Namath. The statistics in this article were astounding. Although Peyton Manning has not actually competed in a Super Bowl yet, he is still one of the greatest quarterbacks of all-time, if not, the best. Although playing in the Super Bowl is a crowning achievement, how come it is always the quarterback that gets downplayed if they never play in one? Barry Sanders never played in a Super Bowl and he has NEVER been labeled as a great running back that never played in the Super Bowl. However; with quarterbacks, it just seems to be a little different. When you hear the name "Dan Marino," you probably think, "oh yeah, one of the best quarterbacks to never play in a Super Bowl." What about Trent Dilfer? He's an extremely mediocre quarterback that won a Super Bowl, but will he go to the Hall of Fame? I doubt it, but after looking Joe Namath's career numbers, anything is possible. Besides Joe's victory in Super Bowl III, he did very little in his career. Just read these numbers; Joe Namath threw 173 touchdown passes in his 13 seasons. In that time, he also threw 220 interceptions and only completed 50% of his passes. Namath's record as a starting quarterback was 77-108-3. Peyton Manning on the other hand is 94-53 and has passed for more yards, more completions, and more touchdowns his first nine years than any quarterback in football history. If Joe Namath can be crowned a Hall of Famer in one game, then not winning Super Bowl XLI should take NOTHING away from Peyton Manning. (Although it will be great to see him hoist that Vince Lombardi trophy. Think of the good commercials that will come from it...)

Flopping Might Become Illegal in the NBA

Stu Jackson, VP of Operations for the NBA, announced this week that the NBA is looking into allowing referees to assess players technical fouls for flopping in games. FIBA, which is over international basketball, already allows its referees to hit players with technicals for flopping. As of now, the NBA is just looking into the possibilities of giving referees this added measure of power. I have played basketball both recreationally and competitively for many years, and I have never really understood how players flop. It's borderline cheating in my views. It's like traveling; taking anymore than 2 steps just feels unorthodox. While it could be an honest assessment that mostly everybody who has ever played basketball has flopped before, there are some that are worse than others. Without any further ado, I give you my 2006-07 NBA All-Flop Team:
(1) Sam Cassell, LA Clippers - He has been "poked in the eye" so much I'm surprised he isn't blind yet.
(2) Gilbert Arenas, Washingtion Wizards - How come he never yells "Hibachi!" at the foul line? He's there enough.
(3) Manu Ginobli, San Antonio Spurs - He is a high-flying, free-falling type of player. He's going to hurt himself before anybody hurts him.
(4) Dirk Nowitzki, Dallas Mavericks - He screams and flails his arms and legs around like an unhappy baby.
(5) Tim Duncan, San Antonio Spurs - He's always trying to draw a foul, and always acts surprised when the ref calls nothing.
(Yeah, that's right, Tim Duncan is taking the 5 spot on my team because he is a center. Some would argue that he isn't a center, but he is. The biggest outrage is that he was voted on the West's All-Star team this year as a forward, when he should be a center to make room for another more deserving forward from a conference that has so many that any of them being left out of the All-Star game is considered a 'snub.')
Although I highly despise flopping and those who do it, I don't think that allowing referees to hand out technicals for doing it will change a thing. For one, referees already miss SO MANY calls. Adding one more thing for them to look for will only complicate their already difficult job. And secondly, if the referees understand what's a flop and what's not, then why do they call fouls on flops? You would think that if they could tell the difference then they wouldn't call the foul. That is one of the things being researched by the NBA, if in real time the referees can really tell the difference. If they call fouls now, they won't call technical fouls later.

NBA is Turning Into the NHL

What Ben Wallace and Ron Artest started last year in the "Palace Brawl" has forever changed that face of the National Basketball Association. That is exactly what NBA commissioner David Stern did not want, but you don't always get what you want. Now David Stern must find a way to deal with it. Last year Stern implemented a new dress code for players arriving to the arenas on game day and sitting on the bench to try and increase the professionalism of the players. This year Stern amended the actual uniform attire, outlawing tights and the wearing elbow and knee pads on anything but the elbows and knees. Yeah, some people actually had a problem with that. Kobe at one time wore knee pads down around his ankles. Was it a fashion statement, or did curious little Kobe get into the equipment closet and start playing dress-up? I guess we'll never know, but at least we won't have to witness such stupidity again. Stern also implemented a "Zero-tolerance Policy" in regards to players reacting to referees. Stern's zero-tolerance policy was effective the first few weeks. There were technical fouls being thrown out faster than steroid suspensions in MLB. However; none of these new stipulations and guidelines have succeeded in increasing the sportsmanship of players. This year there have been three more brawls in the NBA. The first of the year was in New York, dubbed by me as the "Midget Melee in Madison Square Garden." Just like Ben Wallace was the initial perpetrator in the Palace Brawl, Nate Robinson was the initial perpetrator at the Midget Melee in MSG. Had nobody else got involved, J.R. Smith would have knocked Robinson back to the Shire. That brawl became even more embarrassing after Carmelo Anthony slapped, not punched, Jared Jeffries and then ran away like there was a fire. The scene at MSG was like the scene between the rival gangs in West Side Story, it was that cheesy. There were some rather heavy suspensions dealt by Stern to "send a message," but apparently not many players got the message.
Last week Kevin Garnett and Antonio McDyess got into a fight that looked eerily similar to a playground fight between two fourth grade boys. Garnett throws the ball at McDyess, McDyess pushes Garnett, Garnett throws a sissy little punch that doesn't connect and then backpedals almost all the way back to Minnesota. I hope Garnett sat in the corner of his room and thought about what he did during the whole one game he was suspended. Yeah, one game. Some message Stern, if anything you are saying that the type of behavior displayed by Garnett is not only acceptable but actually mildly inviting because it might boost ratings.
The third instance simply involved Baron Davis of the Warriors throwing a punch at Clipper Quintin Ross, for which Davis is also receiving a one game suspension.
All of these displays of unsportsmanlike conduct are a black eye to the NBA and sports players everywhere. I personally don't like to watch crybaby millionaires fighting like little kids, and quite frankly I'm sure there are not a lot of people that like to either. Why else would NHL ratings be so low?

Jazz Need to Trade Andrei Kirilenko Now!

Ever since Carlos Boozer arrived in Utah there have been trade rumors involving him. This year has been the first of his three years in Utah that Boozer is 100% healthy and he is turning heads. Boozer is having an All-Star season along with sophomore Deron Williams. In the same amount of time there has been one player that is not turning heads and has not had an All-Star year. Andrei Kirilenko was a NBA All-Star in 2003, since then his shooting is down, his points are down, his rebounds are down, and the only heads that are turning are the ones looking around saying, "Who is this? Who took away Andrei and replaced him with that Russian ogre from Rocky IV?" Andrei still has the ability to block shots, but he is not a center, and the Jazz have needed his scoring, rebounding, and passing desperately. Coach Jerry Sloan has been upset with Kirilenko as recent as a couple of weeks ago when he sat down with Andrei and told him to "stop acting and start playing," referring to Andrei trying to draw fouls instead of just shooting the ball. Last week Jazz owner Larry Miller gave Jazz GM Kevin O'Connor permission to do whatever it takes to make the team better before the NBA trade deadline in February.
Psss.....Kevin.....trade Kirilenko.....

Super Bowl XLI Projections

The road to the Super Bowl will be dramatically different for any two of the four teams that are in the NFC and AFC conference championships this upcoming Sunday. First let's take a look at the NFC, and then AFC.

Chicago Bears-
The Chicago Bears were a team that started off strong and faltered down the stretch. Towards the end of the season, and even into the divisional round of the playoffs, the only part of Chicago's game that has been exceptional has been special teams. The offense, behind a much maligned Rex Grossman, has been adequate, but has committed far too many turnovers. The defense is simply not as ferocious as it has been in year's past. As one sports analysts pointed out, the Bears are not particularly good at anything right now, but have found ways to win. Yesterday against the Seahawks, they won by virtue of the Seahawks not taking advantage of three opportunities to score in Bears territory within the last 4 minutes of the game and into the overtime. The question still remains why Mike Holmgren would punt with 1:59 left in the game on a 4th and 15. Sometimes I wonder why head coaches get paid so much. They are pretty much millionaire motivational speakers.

New Orleans Saints-
The quietest and best free agent signing of the off-season was the Saints' signing of quarterback Drew Brees. Drew Brees had a career year, passing for close to 4,500 yards and elevating the Saints offense to the best in the NFL. Drew Brees had plenty of help along the way with highly touted Heisman winner Reggie Bush and not so highly touted Marques Colston. The two rookies were the Saints leading receivers this year, and with Deuce McAllister healthy again in the backfield, the Saints had a bruising and versatile offense. What's interesting is to look at how the experts thought the Saints would do this year. In ESPN.com's pre-season power rankings, the Saints were 27/31 in the NFL. While on the subject, the projected Final Four were the Seahawks, Panthers, Steelers, and Colts. In the words of Chris Berman, "And that's why they play the game."

New England Patriots-
Tom Brady had a great season, though not as good as season's past. Some might credit it to a depleted wide receiver core, but I'm not going to buy that. Jabar Gaffney, Troy Brown, and Reche Caldwell may not be the biggest names, but they can run routes and are consistent. The Patriots were able to add rookie running back Laurence Maroney, giving them a duel threat in the backfield similar to teams like the Saints and Broncos. With all that in consideration, no matter how mediocre the Patriots season was, they are a different team in the playoffs. Post-season Tom Brady is the Michael Jordan of the NFL. How sad was their divisional game with the Chargers though? After the game, a few Patriots went to the Charger emblem on the field and mocked the San Diego players. As Ladainian Tomlinson said after the game, "They showed no class at all, and maybe it comes from the head coach." Amen LT, there's no reason for things like that in a hard-fought football game. As a matter of fact, there's no reason for things like that EVER. Shame on the Patriots, and I don't like Bill Belichick, so shame on him too.

Indianapolis Colts-
The Colts started 9-0 for the second straight year and finished with 10 or more wins for the fifth straight year. The Colts consistently win, and their defense is consistently bad. This year, Peyton Manning still worked his magic, but when he was a little off, the defense was never there to save him. Well, that was until the playoffs. The defense has stepped up the last 2 games after Peyton's 2 straight lackluster games (which isn't new to Peyton in the playoffs, who is still trying to shake the "choker" title that has followed him). After all the years of the Colts being the best team in the NFL and never making the Super Bowl, it only makes sense that this year they will make it to the Super Bowl. They have been the underdog in both of their playoff games thus far, and look to be the underdog this week as well. Maybe going under the radar is what Tony Dungy has been trying to do all these years and finally has his team where he wants them.

This year has definitely lived up to the hype, the playoffs so far have been competitive, and this week's games look to be no different. Here is my Super Bowl prediction, take it or leave it: COLTS vs. SAINTS!

Michelle Wie, You Need to Find Your Place!

Is anybody else sick and tired of hearing about Michelle Wie? I certainly am. Never has such mediocrity ever been tolerated so much in golf. It's like the golf world is trying to find another Tiger Woods, thinking they have found it in the form of a teenage girl. Please...it's also like the NBA trying to find another Michael Jordan. I've got a message for all the people in the basketball and golf worlds: THERE WILL NEVER BE ANOTHER TIGER WOODS, AND THERE WILL NEVER BE ANOTHER MICHAEL JORDAN! LeBron James is really good, but will he win 6 championships? I highly doubt it. Michelle Wie will do good things on the LPGA, and at Stanford (where she plans to attend college), but will she ever win a PGA tour event? Simply put, no! In her few years of participating in PGA tour events, Wie has never made a cut! Yesterday Ms. Wie posted a +8 on her first 9 holes at the Sony Open, so playing this weekend isn't looking too bright for her either. It seems as though Michelle is a lost cub, just like Simba in the Lion King. "You need to find your place in the circle of life." And Michelle, just to get the thought process started, your place is not on the PGA tour.

All Hail the San Diego SUPER CHARGERS!

There are a million reasons to root for a sports franchise. You may live in the city the team plays, there may be players on the team that you like to watch, they may have players that suck but share the same alma mater as you, so you feel inclined to cheer for them. While watching The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (which might I add is much better than Jay Leno and Conan O'Brien) Craig gave his reason to cheer for the San Diego Chargers. It was because of their theme song. That's right, the Chargers have a theme song! It's catchy, original, and when I listen to it I want to think it's cheesy, but my hips don't lie. I have always liked the Chargers, what's not to like about LaDainian Tomlinson? He's so un-TO-like, and what's not to like about that? Listen to the song by clicking HERE and you will be a believer in the Super Chargers too. I have a feeling there is going to be a great influx in the Charger Nation when this song gets out.

What is Wrong with the Colts?

This has been a wacky season in the NFL. For one, the Pittsburgh Steelers, last year's Super Bowl Champions, are not even going to make the playoffs. The Seattle Seahawks, who played Pittsburgh last year in the playoffs, are stumbling at 8-5, having lost to the lowly Arizona Cardinals last week. Given, the Seahawks have played all but two games with two hobbled superstars in Matt Hasselbeck and Shaun Alexander, but I'm still surprised. Did you know that since December 2005, eight players on the Cincinatti Bengals team have been arrested? Those orange and black stripes are beginning to look white and black. Some other wacky things include Brett Favre and Eli Manning. Brett is almost 65, still has a rocket for an arm, and refuses to quit. Eli is still underperforming and I'm still not convinced that he'll ever come close to his brother in talent, leadership, mechanics, or making good commercials. How about the Chicago Bears? They are quite possibly the worst-best team ever. They continue to win, but the critics refuse to lay off of them. Then there is the Cowboys, finally somebody got some sense in them and realized that Drew Bledsoe is not a winner. Did Parcells forget why the Patriots won three Super Bowls after he left? Yup, it's because they benched Bledsoe. Tony Romo is turning into another Tom Brady, in talk that is. I don't think he'll ever win a Super Bowl in Dallas. It's been a while since I've sang, "When the Saints Go Marching In." Reggie Bush is the #1 decoy in NFL history, and Drew Brees is playing like a champ. I bet the Texans kick themselves everyday for having drafted Mario Williams instead of Reggie Bush. The Texans claimed that they didn't need a running back because they had Domanick Davis. Now that Domanick Davis is out for the season, the boo birds are out in Houston. Amongst all of these headlines of 2006, the wackiest thing in my mind is how the Colts cannot put together a decent defense to save their lives. Last week the Colts allowed 375 yards on the ground. 375! In one game! And that's not to mention the return yards that Jacksonville tallied, which was 178 yards! Albeit, Peyton Manning's offense only scored 17 points, but I believe that defense affects offense. The weight of the game is on the shoulders of the Colts offense every game and it is beginning to show now that they have lost 3 of their last 4 games. Maybe this is a sign that the Colts are going to win the Super Bowl. In years past, The Colts have been a totally different team during the regular season than in the playoffs. They have been awesome in the regular season and lousy choke artists in the playoffs. Hmmm.......I think Tony Dungy is on to something!

Paul Millsap NBA Rookie of the Year?

Have you ever heard of Paul Millsap? A lot of people outside of Louisiana (where he played college basketball) and Utah (where he now plays for the Jazz) have not, but he is the early selection for rookie of the year. Click here to read John Hollinger's rookie rundown on ESPN.com.

Politics Run Wild in College Football

Troy Smith is going to win the Heisman, Ohio State and Florida are playing in the National Championship game, and only one "student athlete" from a mid-major conference, Colt Brennan, is even being considered for any hardware. I find glaring problems with all of these situations, and I blame it mostly on politics. Reality is what a person's perception is. The press and media have a huge impact on peoples perception of reality, and that largely dictates the polls. The media and press have developed the whole idea of a "major conference" and a "mid-major conference." How Duke, Baylor, and North Carolina are in a major conference is beyond me.
Since week one of the season, they have told us that Troy Smith is the best quarterback in the nation. While Troy Smith has done little to dazzle, he has not disappointed. However; there are a plethora of quarterbacks in the nation who have comparable, if not better statistics than Troy Smith and they aren't even being talked about. You may say, "Well, Troy Smith and the Buckeyes played harder teams." Well, that's what they would have you think. And why is it that people made a huge deal over Reggie Bush's parents possibly receiving free housing and gifts from USC last year, yet nobody has even made mention the factual truth that Troy Smith was suspended by Ohio State for a year and has even spent time in the slammer?
I looked at a rundown of all the student athletes being considered for the postseason hardware and well over 75% of them play for schools from Texas eastward. There is somewhat of a tunnel vision where all the media sees are teams in the east, and USC. Have you ever heard of Eric Weddle? I didn't think so. He plays for the University of Utah and has been the most dominate player on defense I have seen and plays both sides of the ball. However, Eric Weddle plays for a now Urban Meyerless team, so of course nobody knows about him. What about John Beck? He is perhaps the best kept secret in the west.
So, it's going to be #1 Ohio State vs. "#2" Florida in the National Championship Game! Does this really surprise anybody? It didn't surprise me one bit, when USC lost and Florida won, it was eminent in my mind. I wanted Florida to play Ohio State, just to further prove what a load of BS the BCS is. How can a team that is #2(Michigan) after losing to #1(Ohio State) by 3 measly points, be idle for two weeks and be passed up both weeks by teams below them? It's quite simple, because the BCS voters said so. Why is it that Notre Dame (the most overrated team in the nation, just a little ahead of Rutgers) gets an automatic bid if they are in the top 8 of the BCS standings? I know they are considered by some to be "God's University," but the deal they have with the BCS is unchristian. Well, I guess there is a lot of mercy involved, which is a good Christian value.
Having a rematch with Michigan and Ohio State just couldn't happen. Firstly, if Ohio State won, then people would complain that it's ridiculous that a team has to beat another team twice in order to win the National Championship. Secondly, if Michigan would have won, then people would complain that each team won one game, but the team that won the second game is the National Champion. To add to it, Ohio State won the conference and both teams would be 12-1. So, to avoid all that mess, they opted to pit Florida against Ohio State. Florida played the "hardest schedule" in college football, and they won their conference. I hope that Florida wins, then the people in Michigan are really going to go wild, yelling shirtless in the streets of Ann Arbor, "We could have beat Florida!" Well, given they beat USC in the Rose Bowl they'll be saying that. In conclusion, college football is the greatest sport, until the season is over and politics, not the athletes or the teams, decides everything.

Utah Jazz #1

For the first time since Karl Malone and John Stockton, I can honestly say with statistical evidence and no bias that the Utah Jazz are #1. At 15-4, the Jazz are first place in their division, first place in the Western Conference, and first place in the NBA. I wouldn't be as ecstatic if they were first place on the Eastern Conference. Bill Simmons of ESPN.com has an excellent article concerning the crappiness of the Eastern Conference, it's definitely worth a read. Did you know that 11 of the 15 teams in the East are at least two games below .500? Well, they are, and that is pathetic. This year, some people are calling the East the worst conference in sports history. I can't say that I disagree. Moving back to the Jazz, they have a team full of a bunch of "no names" that will never make good for themselves, yet they continue to win. I guess my #1 preseason prediction wasn't as far fetched as some people thought. I know how hard it is for the Jazz to earn respect, I have been a lifelong Jazz fan and can attest to that. Even tonight on TNT, Charles Barkley and Kenny Smith questioned if the Jazz are legitimate. Hello? You don't go 15-4 just by getting lucky. I guess Sir Charles still has a bitter taste in his mouth after Stockton hit that game winning shot at the buzzer of the 1997 Western Conference Finals right in his face! Check out that picture, Barkley got "posterized!"

Most Underrated Rivalry in College Football?

No question about it, that rivalry would be BYU vs. Utah. This year's matchup will go down as one of the greatest rivalry games in college football history. If you missed it, you missed out. BYU won the game 33-31 on a touchdown pass from senior quarterback John Beck to senior tight end Jonny Harline with no time left on the clock. It was BYU's first win in five years and was the sixth in the last seven games between the two teams where the winner won by seven or less points. BYU moved to 10-2, having gone undefeated in the Mountain West Conference for the first time in five years as well. BYU still has one game to play in the Las Vegas Bowl, they will be playing the Oregon Ducks. The offensive coordinator for Oregon is former BYU head coach Gary Crowton. Crowton was at BYU from 2001-2004, this will be his first meeting against BYU since leaving. It should be an interesting and intense game.
Click HERE to watch highlights from the 2006 BYU-Utah game!

What's in a Uniform?

Have you ever found yourself rooting against a team because they have ugly uniforms? I have, all the time! It's just so hard to watch ugly things, that's why I don't watch Desperate Housewives, or any of the awards shows. I had a difficult time rooting for the Cincinnati Bengals for the longest time, but their uniforms have grown on me lately and now I like them. There haven't been many weeks where I've been able to cheer for the University of Oregon's football team. Nike has made sure that Oregon's jerseys are constantly the laughing stock of college football. As bad as those uniforms are year in and year out, at least Nike has never sunk as low as to put a "bib" on Oregon's jerseys like they did to BYU's uniforms in 1998. Really bright colors are horrible for jerseys; they are hard on the eyes and look...well...horrible. The WNBA can get away with it because nobody watches them anyway. Teams such as the Atlanta Hawks, Seattle Supersonics, and Cal's football team with their yellow uniforms, and even the Chicago Bears with their orange uniforms should feel embarrassed every time they play in those ridiculously bright uniforms. The internet pictures do not do them enough justice. With the college basketball season starting again, well over half of the schools have changed their uniforms, and well over half of that half has traded nice jerseys in for fashion nightmares. Why does Nike and Adidas continue to get paid to put out such awful uniforms? It will be a mystery to me forever more. Very few teams outfitted by Nike have been lucky enough to get decent uniforms. As for the rest, as sad as it may be, they will NEVER win in style.

NFL Mid-Season Report - Part 2 of 2

As eight games in the season have come and gone, there have been a lot of interesting stories. In my mid-season report I will cover the five most depressing stories of the season thus far in part 1 and the five most exciting stories in part 2.

The 5 Most Exciting Stories of the 2006 NFL Season

1. Nobody has complained about the new ball yet
With all of the attention going to the new NBA ball, nobody has commented on the new NFL ball. What? You didn’t know that NFL has a new ball this year? Well, they do. This year there is a large gold NFL insignia, and it’s signed by the new commissioner Roger Goodell. While NBA players have been crying bloody murder over the new ball that isn’t consistent, and gets sticky, the NFL still continues to play in the rain and snow with their new ball. I think the volatile weather conditions on a football put the players at a larger disadvantage than NBA players when sweat gets on the basketball. The last time I checked, the “new” NBA ball is the same size and weight as the old ball, and aren’t the rims the same diameter?

2. T.O. single-handedly destroying the Dallas Cowboys
Terrell Owens is a disease that infects whatever team he is playing for. This season's victim is the Dallas Cowboys. Owens is like an amazing drug with horrible side effects. “Incredible receiver with speed and quickness! WARNING! Side effects may include: having a losing season, having more news reporters than players at practice and in the locker room, total destruction of team morale, and one more overpaid crybaby that “wants the damn ball.””

3. The Oakland Raiders being so bad
I was secretly hoping that Oakland Raiders wouldn’t win a single game this season. Then I thought about the pain and agony of seeing Adrian Peterson from Oklahoma get drafted by them next year. So, I secretly cheered for the Raiders to win at least a couple of games and now they have. Now I have a new predicament, if the Houston Texans finish last and pick first in the draft, they’re bound to screw it up and NOT pick Peterson. If that happens, the Raiders would then get Peterson. So, now I am bound to cheer for the Raiders to win at least a couple more games.

4. The resurgence of the New Orleans Saints
Was I the only one that believed in Drew Brees? The New Orleans Saints picking him up was one of the biggest free-agent signing that nobody cared about. I can’t believe that the New Orleans Saints stayed with Aaron Brooks as long as they did. The Saints have all the weapons to make a run this season. Reggie Bush is the best decoy player to ever take the field. He hasn’t had incredible stats this season, but when he takes the field he opens up so many other players for the Saints.

5. Peyton Manning working his magic yet again
He just keeps silencing the critics. Every year they say that you can’t win with a bad defense, but Peyton Manning just keeps on doing his thing. Watching Peyton run the offense is like watching somebody doing something good that looks and/or sounds good! The Indianapolis Colts are 8-0 this season, having beaten the Giants, Patriots, and Broncos, all on the road. Now the question becomes, will the Colts choke in the playoffs again? If the Colts do choke in the playoffs, Peyton can always fall back on his successful commercials, those are great.

NFL Mid-Season Report – Part 1 of 2

As eight games in the season have come and gone, there have been a lot of interesting stories. In my mid-season report I will cover the five most depressing stories of the season thus far in part 1 and the five most exciting stories in part 2.

The 5 Most Depressing Stories of the 2006 NFL Season

1. The Seahawks Playing Without Hasselbeck and Alexander
Given, the Seahawks did not look that great with Matt Hasselbeck and Shaun Alexander, but seeing both of them go down just doesn’t seem fair. Maybe this is the year where the “Super Bowl Curse” starts. That is, the two teams that go to the Super Bowl will have a downer year the next season. The Pittsburgh Steelers are sure living up to their part of the curse; the Seahawks are not going to lie down as easily though. Oh, and has anybody else ever seen such a pathetic excuse for a tight end have so much trash to talk? Ahem, Jerramy Stevens, you're not that good, and I'm glad you got kneed in the crotch.

2. The NFL Being Such Stiffs Over TD Celebration Dances
Ask any loyal NFL fan and they will tell you that last year had the best end-zone celebrations ever. So what does the NFL do this year? Yeah, if you guessed they took the fun out, then you would be correct. Where’s the fun in a spike? Marvin Harrison of the Indianapolis Colts got a penalty last week because of an errand spike that hit an opposing player. The spike just might be gone next year, stay tuned.

3. People Thinking the Chicago Bears are for Real this Year…Again!
Rex Grossman is the quarterback that fantasy football players love to hate. You never know when he might throw for 3 touchdowns, or 4 interceptions. I’m so glad that the Miami Dolphins just squashed the Bears' hopes at an undefeated season so that talks stop now. I don’t believe in the Chicago Bears, the same hype surrounded them last year when the Carolina Panthers exploited their "perhaps the best defense of all time" in the 2005 playoffs. Here’s a prediction for you, the New York Football Giants will beat the Chicago Bears on Sunday, and they might do it again in the playoffs if they meet.

4. Matt Leinart Getting Stuck in Arizona
Matt Leinart has so much promise as a quarterback in the NFL. He has great mechanics and poise for a rookie. He also has a lot of guts to drop back in the pocket knowing that at any second he could get smothered because the Arizona Cardinals have such a shoddy offensive line. The Cardinals spent so much money getting Edgerrin James that they forgot to get an offensive line to block for him. Sounds to me like the brain trust in Arizona will squander two more talents. And I thought that Matt Leinart would be better off than Reggie Bush...

5. Michael Vick Not Living Up to Lofty Expectations…Again!
Michael Vick is sure athletic, but he’s not a quarterback. He has some good games, has put up some good stats, but he is incapable of leading his team. I like Michael Vick, but we all need to just realize that Michael Vick will never win a Super Bowl no matter where he plays, unless he’s sitting on the bench watching.

Preferential Star Treatment

After going to the Houston Rockets/Utah Jazz game in Salt Lake, there is one thing I know for certain. The "NBA Live ’07 Curse” will not start this year. Barring some freak accident, or T-Mac not being able to cut it because he’s not conditioned enough, he won’t have a “bad” year. Last night he scored 25 points in the Rocket’s season opening loss. Not bad, considering he was 8-24 from the field and 8-13 from the free throw line. At least he made over 50% of his free throws. The fact of the matter is that any player who came close to making contact with T-Mac was called for a foul. On two instances, Matt Harpring and Andrei Kirilenko were called for fouls without even touching T-Mac. One was on an air-ball 3 point try, and the second on a layup in crunch time with five minutes remaining in the game. Ridiculous? You better believe it! And what can opposing players do about it? Absolutely nothing! With the NBA’s new “zero tolerance policy,” a player will get a technical foul for even raising an eyebrow over a questionable call. As if the officials did not have a hold on the game before, the NBA has given them more power. It’s going to be another fun-filled season; I’m looking forward to it. I think I’m going to have a heart attack when I’m 35.

NBA Preseason Rankings - Part 5 of 5

It's that time of year where everybody is releasing their NBA preseason rankings. I've never seen a preseason ranking that was indicative of how they rank at the end of the season, but I can assure you that my rankings will stay just about the same ALL year. That's because I'm ranking according to how much I respect them(1), or how little I respect them(30). In part 5 of 5, I'll rank teams 1-6.

1. Utah Jazz- Are you really surprised by this one? The Jazz may not be the greatest basketball players, but they are darn good guys. The second DeShawn Stevenson raped that girl back in 2001, I knew he was gone. Last year when Robert Whaley got into a domestic dispute, I knew he was gone too. You have to respect a team where winning is not the most important thing, and that is not something that only losers say. "How 'bout them Jazz?!"

2. Miami Heat- Dwayne Wade should be the new face of the NBA, not LeBron James, not Kobe Bryant. He has outstanding sportsmanship, is married with a kid, plays with heart, and has a very active role in his community. What a stud! Since Shaq left the Lakers, I've taken notice that he isn't that bad either. Alonzo Mourning's story is every bit as good as Jerome Bettis of the Pittsburgh Steelers. Have you seen the Lincoln Navigator commercial with Dwayne Wade where he puts up a basketball hoop in a neighborhood and then gives the coach the Navigator and the players all basketballs? I'm lead to believe that's not far from the truth in any way. Those pink and orange uniforms have got to go, though.

3. Phoenix Suns- Hallelujah! Steve Nash no longer looks like a wet sewer rat! The new hair looks good, his stock is rising now. Whoever is on the PA at Suns games has the best job ever elongating such names as Amare Stoudemire, Shawn Marion, Boris Diaw, Eric Piatkowski, Raja Bell, and Leandro Barbosa. It's too bad they traded away the rights to Rajon Rondo. Has anybody ever seen a gorilla in Phoenix outside of US Airways Center and the zoo? Just wondering.....

4. Cleveland Cavaliers- I'm glad that Sprite changed their commercial concept with LeBron James. I remember the old commercials with Karl Malone and David Robinson, they were quite misleading. Here's how the commercials would go: Karl Malone/David Robinson are playing basketball and not playing well. Karl Malone/David Robinson go to the sideline and chug a 20 oz. Sprite. Karl Malone/David Robinson go back onto the court and dominate. Yeah, I tried that once, I ended up on the ground in the fetal position screaming of cramps. I don't drink Sprite anymore.

5. Houston Rockets- Thank goodness that the "EA Sports Madden Curse" does not hold true for the NBA. Every player that has graced the cover of a Madden game since 2001 has either ended the season injured or had a horrible season. As Tracy McGrady dons the cover of NBA Live '07, lets hope that he has his first healthy season in a long time or he just might start the "EA Sports NBA Live Curse." Who wants to make a bet on how long it takes Yao Ming to say a complete coherent sentence in English? Karl Malone still can't.....

6. Washington Wizards- Did you know that Gilbert Arenas has a huge tiger face tattooed on his chest? His belly button is on the chin of the tiger. It's one of those tattoos where you wonder if he was drunk when he got it or an alternative to putting a girlfriends name on his arm that he knew he was going dump. Regardless, Arenas is an awesome player and has single handedly lifted the Wizards to a playoff caliber team in the East. Given, it doesn't take much to make the playoffs in the East, but Arenas is good. I got a kick out of the Wizards two years ago when they had a party for advancing to the second round of the playoffs with shirts and champagne. They stooped to the levels of Major League Baseball, ugh.

NBA Preseason Rankings - Part 4 of 5

It's that time of year where everybody is releasing their NBA preseason rankings. I've never seen a preseason ranking that was indicative of how they rank at the end of the season, but I can assure you that my rankings will stay just about the same ALL year. That's because I'm ranking according to how much I respect them(1), or how little I respect them(30). In part 4 of 5, I'll rank teams 7-12.

7. Minnesota Timberwolves- Kevin Garnett is awesome. The new Gatorade Rain commercial with him hatching from a basketball scares me a little. The graphic nature of it petrified me the first time I saw it. However, the other commercial with him, Peyton Manning and Derek Jeter as little kids with big heads is Super Bowl worthy. "Shut your big head up!"

8. Seattle SuperSonics- I never liked the Sonics until they got Ray Allen. When asked what his goal was in his first season at Seattle he said, "I want to become more popular than coffee!" Funny guy. If you ever play NBA '05, be the Sonics. Ray Allen, Vladimir Radmanovic, and Rashard Lewis all shoot 75% from the 3-point line! Oh, and props to all of you Seattleites for telling the owner of the Sonics to shove it when he wanted tax payers to pay for the construction of a new arena. Talk about a millionaire cheapskate.

9. Los Angeles Clippers- The fact that the Clippers were in the dumps for so long and now are so good makes you like them. I feel it all goes back to Elton Brand, one of the few Duke players to not be a NBA bust. The only reason why the Clippers are so low is that "antman" Sam Cassell. What a coniving little fake. Here's a defense tip for anybody guarding Cassell; don't get your hands near his face or he'll drop to the floor screaming and grabbing his eye like you poked it right out!

10. Philadelphia 76ers- It's sad that Allen Iverson has never been surrounded with any talent. Well, basketballwise that is. Kyle Korver is good at looking like Ashton Kutcher. It's a shame that AI was passed over in favor of Chris Paul for the USA team at the World Championships this past summer. Iverson wasn't even allowed to tryout, lame! If AI never wins a NBA Championship, he can rest assured that Air Jordans will always take a backseat to his shoes.

11. New Jersey Nets- Was it Vince Carter that made wearing tights popular in the NBA? After dunking over that 7-2 guy from France in the 2000 Olympics, he can do whatever he wants in my mind. I really wish that New Jersey would stop choking and utilize the talent that they have.

12. Orlando Magic- Okay, so the Steve Francis/Tracy McGrady trade was horrendous. I'm not too sure how signing Darko Milicic will end up for them either. Going into this season he is averaging 1.5 point per game! But, they made good with the Puerto Rican community in signing Carlos Arroyo. I heard there is a petition going around Orlando to change the team name to the Orlando "Majica." If this ranking was based on their team mascot, the Magic would definitely be in the bottom five with the teams that don't even have a mascot. Their mascot looks like Gonzo on crack! What is coming out of his nose?